Back to fucking school…I’m not ready

I   I  just  don’t  know,  there  I’m feeling some you  know, i can’t  discribe  how i’m feeling  there, maybe  I have  some  friends  with who  I  can  laugh  there  or do  some  funny things, but  all ambience is  so  dumb  and  empty  fuck  that  in  the  mornings  I’m  like going to hell. and I  really  don’t want to  repeat it  every day I wanna  see  new  thing  every day make  new  things  be defferant places  have  fun, be  happy, to get  off  from that same motion of  all  the  world…I  want  to be  free  to  be  other  I don’t  want to follow  all  the life rules  and be like  every boring body…. I want  real  inspiration..I  want new country every day.. That’s  fantasy Imagine  I’m  not here, I’m  really so,  so far..I’m  living  without  rules I’m enjoying  life and STOP!! Get  up  babe it  was only dream, but  I  need make  it real..

Really  time  is  waisting  so  so  fast,  and  I want  super speed, I don’t  want  to  stop..sometimes  i’m imagining if that 2 or 3  years will  pass and  I  will  visit  in all my dream  countries am  I  really  gonna  be  happy..I mean  happy at  all. but if  really  I  don’t  want  to be  happy at all. i want feel hurt I  want spend my time thinking  what  i  did I don’t want that perfect I  want live just  differant……..I want  other world  and  no rules..

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We are here sad. lost. and empty.. I DONT CARE AT ALL

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I don’t  know..I’m  other person. my minds where  they are.  i  don’t  care in  future..my  fucking  future I  can  get  it  but I  can’t  at  the  same  time…I’m inspired I’m living  i’m  not realist  anymore I’m  not  afraid  to  make mistakes  or lose  my  friends or they’re just  acting  that  they  are  friends…If  really  i  don’t  care  i will have friends or not and  I’m  even don’t  care  that  they  have  more  cool  things..maybe  I’m  getting  angry maybe I  don’t  have  anything  to say, I  want that  freedom  and  I’ve  got  it  i’m  not  afraid  to  tell  them  that  I can live  better  without  them

I  want  that empty  and  mysterious  way..Maybe  i  grewn  up  faster and  I  understand  that  life isn’t  briliant and  nobody cares  cuz it  would be shit big shit if  life  will get perfect that  perfect is “perfect” not  real not good  as  people..

who needs  that  “perfect”..I’m smiling I  don’t  know  why..I’m a  freak.  i  just  want  be  Free  freak..i  have  to be..I’m  searching  that  clean,  empty and  at  the  same  time a full way..

I wanna  be  strong. to wait..freedom and love that’s all  need us…Forever,  forever  forevea………………and  yeah  i’m in  love  this  fucking  cool  lifeeeeeee  forever forever forever…..

I’m chainging Day by Day x I’m like alien

11141303_451357515068112_7855541222113116474_n                                                        I  really  feel,  anythings I  can’t  understand  what  the fuck  with me  I  even can’t understand  is  it  good  or  not…  I don’t  know..I  started  don’t  think  a  lot  how  I  did  in  before..I’m like other person, yes I’m  continuing  dream  about  what  I  dreamt  in before,  but  something  other I  want  it  so so freaking  much right  now  to, but I’m not what  I  was….Even  music, my  music  have  changed and what  the fuck..

I’m like  I  don’t know, I’m  not  afraid of  anything, i’m  not afraid  to say that  I  like  my  fat body  or that  I  loveeeeeeeeeeee  thisssss   freaaaaaaaaaaakkkkkkkkiiiinnnnnnnnggggggggggggg beeeeeeaaaaaaaauttttiiiiiiiiffuuuuuuuuuullllllllll    lifeeeeeeee ♥♥♥♥♥

I  HAVE  NO RULES  I  CAN  MAKE  MISTAKES I  WANT  TO  MAKE  MISTAKES I’M  A  FREE  FREAK…..

I WANT  TO  HOLD  ON  ALL MY  DREAMS  AND  TAKE  CARE  OF  THEM  ALL, CUZ I WANT  THAT..

I DON’T  KNOW MYSELF BUT  I  LOVE IT………

STAY WITH ME  GOD  MY♥

Fun time, Life is smiling at me

And  hey  from any long time…I’ve just  got internet and maybe already passed a  month  something  changed and  I’m  so  glad  that  I could  change any little  things..

So  let’s  tell  u  what happened during  a month..I’ve  got healthy and  I’m  feeling  better..Me and  my frend we are going  some  pretty  cool  place which  I  found and  I’m so  so  glad  that  I  found  in my  country American library, that’s like  place  what about  I  always dreamt…We are  watching there  English  movies we’re doing debate and reading classes that’s  really  so  fun..And  I  even took  some  American  book, that’s always  were me little  dream  have  real  English book..Guys  maybe  I’m  sound  dumb and  that is  weird  for  you that  I’m  getting happy  for  just one  stupid  book, but really appreciate what  you have  cuz very many  persons  dreaming about  what you  have  and  about  your life type..I’m  appreciateing my  life  to, coz I  know  any  kids dreaming about  normal  life and maybe my  life  not  what  I  really  want, whatever I’m  so thankful to  God for everything and I  think  that’s most  importanat  thing  in life that’s  have a  Faith coz if  you  have  a  Faith  you  gorra make  your  all  importanat dreams..Dream, Fight and  Belive in  yourself..

Will  be  alright,  I  believe..♥